Thursday, June 22, 2017

Kids in hell and Poverty in America

In many states there is a decline. Schools are looking to have more budget cuts.
Reductionist! Budget cuts reduce to zero. And that helps no one!

"Lawmakers don't have a clue how to fund education."

And the lawmakers push for budget cuts, yet there are plenty $30,000
Dodge trucks, BMW's and  Bugatti Veyron's driving around the
schools watching them crumble. Not really thinking that those kids
in those schools are the labor force.

Good news in Oklahoma is that the small oil companies want the taxes to go up.

And big oil also worried being the declining education.
They are pushing into the class room doing what they can to get
the kids to learn to work into the oil industry. The future of innovation and
growth is balanced on kids that may not be able to read or get a record for
shoplifting food because their parents are broke. Noted in small towns.
It's a bad thing to push in the classroom like that, it is like advertising,
but the point is why the effort to do so. The kids are looking bad getting
out of schools with low funding.

Also true and a good sign of growth with kids today!

The findings suggest Big Oil's environmental challenges and boom-to-bust nature 
have created a negative stigma that will make it difficult to attract talent in the future."

Younger generations "see the industry's careers as unstable, blue-collar, 
difficult, dangerous and harmful to society," the EY report concluded.

For instance, two out of three teens polled believe the oil and gas industry 
causes problems, rather than solves them.

More alarming for oil execs, young people "question the longevity of the industry, as they view natural gas and oil as their parents' fuels."

Well you get what you pay for! The income equality is so high now
with the divide bad, the poor can pull everyone down with them.
"World's eight richest people have same wealth as poorest 50%"

Yes it is bad! Who can trust those moderate rich or middle class when the poor people
could bring them down. "The first 200 Chirons were sold before the first delivery of
the car. The base price is €2,400,000 ($2,700,000 at the August 2016 exchange rate),
and buyers are required to place a €200,000 ($226,000 at the August 2016 
exchange rate) deposit on the car before retrieving it." 
I don't think Bugatti can't even trust them!

The poor taking many down with them? Well yes, kids in America is looking
to be declined. And those kids will be running things you know right?

~~~~~The report also pointed out national findings such as how the number of families living in high-poverty neighborhoods has risen slightly over the past decade. In Arizona, Louisiana, Mississippi and New Mexico, at least 20% of children lived in high-poverty neighborhoods in 2015 as was the case in 2010 to 2014, according to the report.

"There were a few states in there that didn't take advantage of Medicaid expansion," she said. 'They didn't take advantage of the opportunities that the government provided over the past five years."

Other states had huge improvements in child health-care coverage. Between 2010 and 2015, California had a 67% decline in uninsured children, the highest in that time period. Colorado, Minnesota, Nevada, New Mexico, Oregon and South Carolina also had declines of over 50%, according to the report.

Speer said future health-care provisions may have an impact on the progress that has been made surrounding children's coverage.

"We definitely think that the gains we have made over the 10 or 15 years in covering kids and families are potentially at risk with the proposals that have been discussed by the president and congress," she said. "There's little doubt that there will be negative repercussions, especially for low-income familes."

President Donald Trump's proposed budget would cut the Children's Health Insurance Program by at least 20%, as well as Medicaid, which covers millions more kids.

"Kids are about almost half of all the enrollees in Medicaid, so kids would be disproportionately harmed there," said Bruce Lesley, president of First Focus, a nonpartisan advocacy organization for children and family policy issues. "And what we're talking about there is kids who are either poor or disabled, so you're really hitting the most vulnerable kids in society."

Oklahoma is bad but is pushing for better. But it is dependent on the impoverished
environment. Food stamp cuts, Medicaid cuts, un-affordable healthcare pushing why
have it if you can't afford to use it anyway. These kind of things are tied together.
The one effects the others. Poverty is death to any growth as it rules.

Housing for the poor is a reflection of what you will have to look at in the future.
Labor force full of poverty is bad. How many middle class people work at Walmart?
What is Walmart going to be like with homeless workers working?

People these days live on less than 25 percent of their income.
75 percent of their income is spent on rent, utilities, car payments etc...
Living with no AC or winning the lottery is the only thing keeping things running.
Small towns make small wages noted why they have nothing because they make
nothing. Bigger cities have better wages but also with the cost of higher prices.
The wages are higher but many end up in the 50 percent of their income to live on
and that is not bad in view of small towns. But there are more small towns that
could hold back bigger towns in the lack of growth outside of town.

"Nearly 39 million households can't afford their housing, according to the annual 
State of the Nation's Housing Report from Harvard's Joint Center for 
Housing Studies."

"Experts generally advise budgeting about 30% of monthly income for rent or mortgage costs."

"But millions of Americans are far exceeding that guideline.
One-third of households in 2015 were "cost burdened," meaning they spend 30% or more of their incomes to cover housing costs. Of that group, nearly 19 million are paying more than 50% of their income to cover their housing needs."

So keeping the same system without thinking ahead is fail!
Albert Einstein -  Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and
expecting different results.

Monday, June 19, 2017

Normality, Psychosis, Butterscotch waterfall and Julio

Being that I was a psychology major for a long time
in the 90's, I took many classes and been in group talks
over many subjects, ending with the notion everyone has
their own type of normality.

Normality, Psychosis, Butterscotch waterfall and Julio? Go see the videos.

I really did not like the DSM's they seemed conservatarded even in the
90's the cure was pushed to drug, drug. I am a Humanistic Psychology type,
so my view is not good on how Psychology is in my state by the masses.
Is pushing the drugs greed? More exposing the problem in therapy is needed
than concealing it with medication.

More time in therapy needs to be spent in revealing than concealing!
"The foundation of genuine helping lies in being ordinary. Nothing special.
We can only offer ourselves, neither more nor less, to others we have in fact 
nothing else to give.Anything more is conceit; anything less is robbing those 
in distress. Helping demands wholeheartedness, but people find it hard to 
give of themselves to others. Why? In essence we are afraid to offer ourselves 
for fear we will prove insufficient, and if all that we have and are is not enough, 
what then? We are afraid to risk using simply our own warmth and caring, 
 and as a result the thousands of therapy techniques
which are becoming increasingly popular are intended to conceal 
rather than reveal."

Psychiatrist Allen Frances has been critical of proposed revisions
to the DSM-5. In a 2012 New York Times editorial, Frances warned that
if this DSM version is issued unamended by the APA, it will
“medicalize normality and result in a glut of unnecessary and harmful
drug prescription.” In a December 2, 2012 blog post in Psychology Today,
Frances lists the ten “most potentially harmful changes” to DSM-5:

It is the fact your degree is only valued on the paper it's printed on,
and the masses out there have Master hillbilly degrees in Psychology and
push such harmful resolve to drug the patient first, being how the 
pharmaceutical money flows they say "Your, stupid, your stupid!" 
if you go against the BS!

Or it could be the country thinking a Special kind of stupid, backward 
thinking, your smart and that makes you stupid. Your considerate so that 
makes you intrusive. Country thinking relating to their master degree at their 
redneck college they went to so they can say "I'm just as smart as you!" 
without being in the fire learning what is norm! In a high up judgmental 
position without being in life, in the real type life is stupid.

Sort of like doing your master's without a thesis then to pop up like you
are the smartest thing on the block in for it for the money.
Doesn't make it so! It's like going to a "McDonald college" vs Berkeley.
"Drag a hundred-dollar bill through a trailer park, you never know 
what you'll find." James Carville

Where is this going? Lets see where this goes and that is the point!
Usually one gets out in the world and sees what they learned is BS 
and learns better. Education starts after school, to see where it goes!

Your diploma is like a Olympic torch, it's a start of your education!
Like your drivers license, just because you have one doesn't mean you
know how to drive a car. You learn down the road!

I dated a lady hairdresser in the late 1990's that smoked weed and liked
to go at gay bars being she had a hard life and a death treat from a biker gang
and she felt safe at a gay bar that was her security. I'm not gay, she was not gay
it was her security to go there. On the first date at a nice restaurant she went 
to the bathroom and threw-up everywhere. Nervous, high etc she got sick, 
so I took that cougar back to her environment which was the gay bar and all 
was ok it's her normality there.

Also had a lady tell me "We like you." "My other personality likes you and I
trust her so I'm ok with it!" Also had a co-worker that had a 
Corpus Callosotomy done. With me all of those things I seen is called life 
experiences that I can relate by my education I had and seen this stuff with 
my own eyes and I recognize what that is.

To make anything of value you have to get out there and do it!
You can't win the lottery if you don't but a ticket!
Get yourself out of the dark ages, you can't see much in the dark!

My Psychology is from the 90' but all relates to the now.
Pointless over internet use is an addiction and paranoia on who says what
about you on Facebook is all the same as it ever was, it never will change.

This story is not meant to be inflammatory just point noted factual because
patients are human not zombies needing medication. I do say we need more
Humanistic Psychology these days. Medicines are needed but to cure not deal 
with it, unless you are in that state of pure hell in that case you might need to 
be on such medication to nock off that top a bit.

There are other ways of getting a cure like Psychedelic Therapy. It would be 
the shock to cure many without the life time of Medicines. It's worth looking at 
when looking at the way life is for many with the current mindset of 
psychology today!

So what is normal? It's just to the fact of if people call you crazy then the 
judgement of such is noted to be an issue of how educated the people around 
you are. A norm in LA is not the norm in Alabama! People that call others crazy 
in a bad way, don't understand life themselves.

But also normal should not be detrimental for ones self in the reasoning of their
self image reflecting their place in the world. Have you ever been to some town
and ran across those few people that dress up like a Pirate, a guy in a dress or
a 40 year old Gothic lady. Every town has someone, but the point is what is
behind it. Is it to get attention? A stagnate mindset not willing to grow out of it.
A guy in a dress might be stressed to be who he is, not willing to make it happen
because the operation cost too much or other factors.
So in what case it might be the point is to ask what is behind it, why do you do
the things you do! It's ok to do them but to know if it's not detrimental to you!

~~~~~Because the more life goes on, the more “normal” feels out of reach.
So I’ve chosen to accept the unconventional and actually feed off of it.
No one needs to approve of my life but me.
Yes, at times I have to remind myself of the benefits of the unbeaten path,
but I’ve given myself the freedom to create my own “normal.” 
And you know what? It has helped me live in the moment, embrace opportunity, 
and accept what is. I’m listening to myself – not the “shoulds” about the life 
I want to lead. To be clear, I’m not against the normal life by any means.
I’m sure one day I’ll be in a version of it myself.  But I do want to emphasize 
that in reality, there is no normal life. There is just life. 
 And I am sure as hell living it!

"Nature loves courage. You make the commitment and nature will respond to 
that commitment by removing impossible obstacles. Dream the impossible dream 
and the world will not grind you under, it will lift you up. This is the trick. 
This is what all these teachers and philosophers who really counted, 
who really touched the alchemical gold, this is what they understood. 
This is the shamanic dance in the waterfall. This is how magic is done. 
By hurling yourself into the abyss and discovering it's a feather bed."
Terence McKenna

"Feeling unstable having crazy thoughts testing your limitations all the time."
Is growth it's a part in your life finding who you are.
It's finding out your normality was never normal in the first place.
So you push on to find out your own self!

Sunday, June 18, 2017

Privatization, Oklahoma's Medicaid agency opts to cancel

Anytime you hear the word Privatization you should know
it means they are for profit in a climate facing more growth
of people in need. Also facing Trumps Medicaid cuts etc.

To privatize is to take away from people because they are
for profit to make money not loose it in the light of them loosing
money with Trumps's cuts!

"The fixed payments provide an incentive to cover only the most effective 
treatments and encourage patients to live healthier lives."

Just do without and eat more kale!

"This statewide model would have saved money for Oklahoma with a program that would better serve these individuals, providing a greater continuity of care and services that would have kept them out of the hospital and in their own homes. Any uncertainty of funding would make adopting this model all the more important," said David, R-Porter."

Just stay home we can't cover that, well... You have insurance but can't afford to use it 
anyway so...

This is a good thing for Oklahoma not doing this. But on the Federal side there
are cuts coming. How are any of these people going to have any spending money?
I feel sorry about all those new stores in town! Might we raise the pay so the
poor could just pull out their checkbook and pay for healthcare themselves,
not use their food money for it being they make the same pay.
Why kill healthcare over people making children wages?
Why are there adults with children making children wages?

~~~~~Asked to delay privatization, Oklahoma's Medicaid agency opts to cancel
Some people in the health care industry are relieved that privatization of an Oklahoma Medicaid program has ground to a halt for lack of funds.

The Oklahoma Health Care Authority canceled the bidding process for companies vying to manage services for the aged, blind and disabled population. The authority oversees SoonerCare, which is Oklahoma's Medicaid system that also provides health coverage for children and low-income people.

Under managed care coordination, one or more for-profit companies cover doctor's visits, prescriptions, long-term care or any other eligible cost while receiving payments from the state. The fixed payments provide an incentive to cover only the most effective treatments and encourage patients to live healthier lives.

Brett Coble, board president for the Oklahoma Association of Health Care Providers, said he hoped the authority would nix the idea.

“One of the chief reasons was the up-front cost to the state that we simply can't afford in the financial state we're in,” said Coble.

Estimates showed the state would have to pay more than $100 million extra in startup costs during the first couple of years as the service transferred to private management.

Coble also said new federal regulations threatened funding for other programs if Oklahoma switched to a managed Medicaid system. Those regulations were introduced after Oklahoma lawmakers ordered a request for managed care proposals in 2015.

“Those things put a substantial amount of federal dollars that not only nursing homes rely upon, but also a lot of our hospitals and funding that teaching hospitals use — it puts all that at risk,” said Coble, whose association represents nursing homes.

Becky Pasternik-Ikard, CEO of the Health Care Authority, said the decision was made in the best interests of the state because there was uncertainty in both state and federal funding.

“In addition to the funds needed to maintain services at current levels, the agency requested approximately $52 million to fund the care coordination model,” Pasternik-Ikard said. “The additional request was not funded; therefore, the agency is unable to move forward with the (request for proposals).”

The process cannot be restarted, and an agency spokeswoman said it's unclear whether the Legislature would have to pass another bill authorizing it.

Delaying implementation drew support this year from most lawmakers and even Gov. Mary Fallin, who asked the authority to wait a year. A resolution introduced at the state Capitol last month would have directed the authority to pause the process indefinitely, but it wasn't given a hearing in the Senate.

The Senate's Appropriations chair, Kim David, said Thursday she disagreed with the authority's reasons for canceling implementation.

“This statewide model would have saved money for Oklahoma with a program that would better serve these individuals, providing a greater continuity of care and services that would have kept them out of the hospital and in their own homes. Any uncertainty of funding would make adopting this model all the more important,” said David, R-Porter.

David also questioned the claim that, in the first year alone, it would cost the state $52 million to fund it.

“These are individuals we're already caring for, and in talking to other states, they encountered no such need for additional funding when they moved to this system,” she said.

But another senator, Rob Standridge, said data from other states shows that privately managed Medicaid is a financial drain when companies come back saying they aren't being paid enough to run the programs.

“I didn't see anything in the three-year analysis where we would experience any significant savings, and I think some of the states around us made us nervous whether we could ever experience savings,” said Standridge, R-Norman.

There is no point

Really there is no point, to mock Trump. I am sure he as many are paranoid and
is on the internet looking at what people say about him. So really what good does it do?
What good has it done from all the other times in our past? It's better to just move on
the action of doing something about it! 

~~~~~Michael Moore says there is no point mocking Donald Trump but
instead people should resist
Michael Moore said there is no point laughing at Donald Trump for not being good at his job but instead urged his opponents to focus on growing the resistance movement.

Discussing Mr Trump’s 100 days in office, the documentary and filmmaker said the fact the US President had been barred from passing a number of policies into law was a good thing and should not be laughed at.

Speaking to Chris Hayes on MSNBC he said: “Nobody should feel glib. Nobody should be laughing.

“What good does it do us and our end  to be even laughing at Trump for all his goofiness and all is big promises if he doesn’t come through with it and at the same time we are kind of happy he hasn’t been able to do a whole lot - so that’s a good thing.”

Mr Hayes told Mr Moore he found himself rooting for Mr Trump to handle the situation in North Korea well and avoid a nuclear war.

"He will navigate us toward [nuclear war]. Our only hope is that, please Pentagon if you're watching, the football, the nuclear football ... I'm guessing they don't have the codes in there. They're never going to put the real codes in there. I hope," he said.

Mr Moore also said the first 100 days of the Trump administration were less about what the US President's successes and failures than about the build-up of a powerful civil society movement.

“Everybody tonight is talking about Trump’s first 100 days but what about the first 100 days of the resistance,” he said.

Unstable president and people needing stability

Unstable president? Well yes! Trump does have a few glitches. 
But you also need to think he is in charge, he can hit the nuke button. 
Trump is already taking action in a small town type of view. 
It's like catering to small town people that never been out of town in 10 years
they don't have a clue what is really going on. America can't be run like a 
small town, it would have nothing like they have nothing!

Or to note as in like how you always see Republican bumper stickers on the most
impoverished cars and trucks and never on a BMW,  Mercedes.
It makes you want to shake those people "Why won't you vote Democrat for people 
that want to pay you better?" It's a tossup if it's that they are sadomasochist voters, 
or stupid! Like how many don't want growth, so the town has been the same 
for 50 years with minimum wage retirees everywhere. Low pay, low growth.
Make nothing, have nothing, so they want nothing because they vote for nothing!
They like it that way! Bad for everyone else!

But really people do seek stable jobs over the higher pay.
And that results as declining for towns. Noted in something like the 
chamber of commerce pushing for higher sales in town, working in bringing in 
stores that do not fit the wages of the town. When most people go backward, 
or just float up or down because of their wages. The wages don't grow so if there is 
a food stamp cut or any cuts the Republicans want to do, the struggling people 
will cut back to compensate. A cigarette tax Oklahoma = taking money away from 
other sales in town as they spend most of their money on the cigarettes.

There is that line of working two jobs that don't help anyway as it's like working
for $8 after taxes for 16 hours. Being it is daunting like waking up for the start
of the 16 hour shifts. Like working at Walmart in 2006 sleeping at 11 am waking up
at 10 pm (Beep, Beep, Beep!) so you can be at work at Walmart making $7 after taxes.
Work then do it again because all of your work you did the night before has vanished.

Having garnishments taking 40 percent of your income so there is no value in working
for $3 after taxes pay when the kids are running loose with the parents stuck at work
for 8 hours a day. It's better to not work!

All of this is bad for sales, growth. It sets consumer based pricing at poverty levels
as the most of the poor won't buy the high priced stuff forcing the prices lower
so they can buy it. Anything is better than nothing! Living within their means at
$8 after taxes pay.

The point????? Raise the minimum wage!!!!!! You get what you pay for!
Why impoverish the consumers they are the labor force also.
This about that question about not living in a third world country.
"What do you work for?" = "Paying the bills!" As most in small towns live
on less than 25 percent of their income! The 75 percent is on rent, bills etc!

~~~~~What Trump doesn't understand about the poor
By and large, Americans can find jobs today. But too often those jobs have wild swings in pay. A mechanic, for example, might earn $3,500 one month and then drop to around $1,000 the next, when customers don't materialize.

The working poor and, increasingly, the middle class are in a state of "persistent anxiety" about their finances, says Jonathan Morduch, the co-author of a groundbreaking new book, "The Financial Diaries," with Rachel Schneider.

President Trump tapped into exactly this deep economic unease during his campaign. He solution is to get more people working. He promised to create the most jobs of any U.S. president. It's a herculean goal, but even if Trump manages it, it probably won't be enough.

The reality is a lot of Americans who have jobs are still suffering. The authors of "The Financial Diaries" followed 235 lower and middle income U.S. families for a year, tracking every dollar they earn and spend. They found that the classic advice to work hard and "save, save, save" just doesn't pan out when so many families face several months a year where they are plunging into poverty, even if they have a job or two.

"This idea that people are misspending money, or are lazy, it's crazy," says Morduch, a New York University Professor of economics and public policy. He argues that America desperately needs better protections for hourly workers and a stronger safety net that can quickly help lower middle class families that fall into poverty for a few weeks or months of the year.

The Trump administration appears to be doing the exact opposite. Trump has proposed slashing funding for key safety net programs, and he has rolled back some Obama-era protections for federal contract workers.

Morduch was stunned by what he found when he closely monitored and interviewed 235 families. Most were working multiple jobs and not overspending at all. In fact, many were actually good savers. It's just their savings was almost always eaten up during the year to cover a "bad month."

He opens the book with Becky and Jeremy, an Ohio couple in their 30s with four kids. Jeremy is a mechanic who fixes the big trucks that crisscross America's highways. Trucks are far more likely to break down in the winter or summer. In those months, Jeremy makes as much as $3,400 a month after taxes. That translates to a healthy $40,000 income, after tax.

But his hours and pay crash during the spring and fall. One month it fell to $1,200. That puts his family below the poverty line. He and his wife had to borrow money from relatives and leave some bills unpaid, which wracks up more debt and stress.

At the end of the book, Jeremy is offered a job with lower total income for the year, but it guarantees a 40-hour work week with a stable paycheck. He takes it, and he and his wife rejoice.

"The basic story is you've got lots of workers who have hourly schedules and those schedules aren't consistent," says Morduch. That's true of waiters, dealers in casinos, grocery store clerks and fast food workers at Chipotle, McDonald's and other chains.

The real life stories in "The Financial Diaries" are backed up by a growing body of research and polling data.

A 2015 Pew poll asked Americas whether they "would prefer to have financial stability or to move up the income ladder." An astonishing 92% chose security over higher pay.

Morduch found a similar result. At the end of the year when he asked the 235 families the same question, 77% chose stability. Most, like Jeremy and Becky, were desperate for more consistent checks so they could plan their lives instead of constantly having to worry if the paychecks would go back up after a tough patch.

It might be tempting to dismiss "The Financial Diaries" as a small sample that isn't representative of America, but the country's largest bank found the exact same thing. The JPMorgan Chase & Co. Institute studied a random sample of 100,000 Chase bank accounts in 2015. There were huge swings in how much money people were earning one month versus the next.

"Volatility was even greater on a month-to-month basis than on a year-to-year basis," JPMorgan found. Some of that was due to months when families received tax refunds or a holiday bonus, but a lot of it was from fluctuations in pay, as "The Financial Diaries" chronicles in detail.

"The typical household did not have a sufficient financial buffer," JPMorgan concluded.
A lot of American families are on a "rocky road," Morduch finds. A simple way to help them is to require employers to let workers know their work schedules at least two weeks in advance, instead of changing it up last minute.
He also cautions that the working poor often turn to credit card debt or payday loans to get through the rough times. They need better options than that.
"We saw so many people get into trouble with credit card debt," he says.

Center of the Universe

The “Center of the Universe” is a little-known mysterious acoustic phenomenon. If you stand in the middle of the circle and make a noise, the sound is echoed back several times louder than it was made. It’s your own private amplified echo chamber.

As the legend goes, a foghorn could be going off in the center of the circle and those on the outside wouldn’t hear it. This may be an exaggeration, but your voice does sound extremely distorted when heard from outside the circle. It’s an incredible effect.

Like the Lake George Mystery Spot—another acoustical vortex that seems to defy the laws of physics the effect is thought to be caused by the sound reflecting off a circular wall, in this case a nearby planter. Still, though many people have studied the cause of the odd anomaly there’s no clear consensus. Whatever the causes of this natural sonic distortion may be, it is truly an amazing place.

Saturday, June 17, 2017

How to Express Feelings and the Wonderwall

I am a lover type in my life I can't be any other way.
From my past loves I know life is short and why be confined in your
own life being false fears or scared about whatever it is.
My loves range from a ex teenage prostitute a victim of human trafficking.
To a lady that took me to a gay bar on the first date being from a death
threat from a biker gang, her testifying against them in federal court.
"Not one biker will step foot in a gay bar!" I guess I protected her, 
like her bodyguard!

When I express my feelings and say I love you I have the background to say that I do!
Background? In 1985 I got hit by a car on my moped.
I was stopped in the street making a left turn when a car doing around 45 mph
going down the road didn't see me because he had something on his dashboard
blocking his view. He hit me the bike went forward and I glided with the car grabbing
hold of the hood hanging on until he stopped hard and I couldn't hang on no more and
I hit the road and skidded with the car holding on to the air dam to not go under the car.
All that happened to me in the end was I bruised my kidney so I turned yellow and
it pulled all the ligaments in one leg because my leg got pulled up too fast as I
went over the hood of the car. It took me months to walk again.

Far more than the lady love that almost hit me. I know it would be the same
more likely but I love her! But that is a story untold as I try to save her from herself..
Or each other as I love her also.

All of these things are ok, just need express your feelings to each other.
Married with a lover is such torment without talking about it to the other.
Hiding is crap like in history over and over... Pain without growing up
talking needs, hopes and dreams. To ask what do you need? Is a good start!
You should be able to talk about such things, if not it's a red flag! Get a Divorce!
"Often and often, a marriage hardly differs from prostitution except by being 
harder to escape from." Bertrand Russell

Just sitting there with a red flag letting life pass you by living your own hell?
Tends to make life a hell for other halves also! Maybe it's better to be hit
by a car than to live in hell. But for me I tend to have a protected destiny,
so it won't happen! What else is there to do? The point of Talking!
To get your love to express her feelings. No one, can be ones secret keeper.
If your holding the bag well it's the point to note like to say don't blame me
I'm holding the bag you won't talk to me!

So that does point to why express your feelings, to stop the hurt!

~~~~~We are wired to have feelings. If we express these feelings in off-putting ways, this wiring can invite a disconnect in our relationships.  By contrast, expressing feelings in a safe way can lead to our feeling more connected, especially to loved ones.  Knowing how to express feelings tactfully therefore is vital if you want to feel close to people and to sustain your  relationships.

Sharing positive feelings solidifies relationships.  Love, appreciation, gratitude, delight sharing these feelings builds affectionate bonds.

At the same time, stresses occur in everyone's life, leaving them with sad, scared or mad feelings.  In addition, differences and hurt feelings will occur from time to time between just about any two people who often interact.  Sharing feelings enables you to talk through the situation that had caused the difficulty.  That way you can figure out how the problem occurred and what to do to fix it. Problem-solving together makes negative feelings lift.  Otherwise the problem may linger or get worse, negative feelings may fester, and both you and your relationship suffer.