Thursday, October 22, 2015

Ashley Madison hacks vs Polyamory vs History

In the light of the Ashley Madison hacks it's has to be said that it has exposed
everyone is human. People having affairs only shows there is a reason why
they do that. It's being wired into us from the cave man days.
It's a primeval response. Noted in the cave man days women had to have sex more
to have a one or two babies vs animals as once and have five, six babies.
http://bigthink.com/think-tank/how-to-make-love-like-a-caveman

Also relating to the times of the caveman days you know there would of have of been
gender equality as your pack had to work as a team or die!
http://www.slate.com/blogs/xx_factor/2015/05/15/sorry_evolutionary_psychology_buffs_a_new_paper_suggests_that_our_caveman.html

But it's not only a cave man view! When you look into Havelock Ellis and his marriage.
"In November 1891, at the age of 32, and reportedly still a virgin, Ellis married the
English writer and proponent of women's rights, Edith Lees. From the beginning, their
marriage was unconventional, as Edith Lees was openly lesbian.
At the end of the honeymoon, Ellis went back to his bachelor rooms in Paddington.
She lived at Fellowship House. Their "open marriage" was the central subject in Ellis's
autobiography, My Life."

"According to Ellis in My Life, his friends were much amused at his being considered an
expert on sex. Some knew that he suffered from impotence until the age of 60.
He then discovered that he could become aroused by the sight of a woman urinating.
Ellis named this "undinism". After his wife, Edith Lees, died, Ellis formed a relationship
with a French woman called Françoise Lafitte."
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Havelock_Ellis

Bertrand Russell also had connections with Lady Ottoline Morrell and
the actress Lady Constance Malleson.

"He soon fell in love with the puritanical, high-minded Alys, who was a graduate
of Bryn Mawr College near Philadelphia, and, contrary to his grandmother's wishes,
married her on 13 December 1894. Their marriage began to fall apart in 1901
when it occurred to Russell, while he was cycling, that he no longer loved her.
She asked him if he loved her and he replied that he didn't.
Russell also disliked Alys's mother, finding her controlling and cruel.
It was to be a hollow shell of a marriage and they finally divorced in 1921,
after a lengthy period of separation.
During this period, Russell had passionate (and often simultaneous) affairs with
a number of women, including Lady Ottoline Morrell and the actress
Lady Constance Malleson."
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bertrand_Russell#University_and_first_marriage

Also noted, life changing read of Chapter 7: The sense of sin.
The Conquest of Happiness (1930) is a book by Bertrand Russell.
http://russell-j.com/beginner/COH-TEXT.HTM

Lady Ottoline Morrell:
"In February 1902, she married the MP Philip Morrell, with whom she shared a
passion for art and a strong interest in Liberal politics. They shared what would
now be known as an open marriage for the rest of their lives."
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lady_Ottoline_Morrell

Lady Constance Malleson:
"During the First World War, her pacifist opinions brought her into contact with
Bertrand Russell, whose mistress she soon became
(having agreed with her husband on an "open marriage").
In 1923, she was divorced from Malleson. Her interest in social reform led her
to travel abroad, and she carried out lecture tours in Scandinavia in the
1930s and 1940s."
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lady_Constance_Malleson

Calvin Coolidge, (The Coolidge Effect?)
Behavioral endocrinologist Frank A. Beach first mentioned the term
"Coolidge effect" in publication in 1955, crediting one of his students with
suggesting the term at a psychology conference. He attributed the neologism to:
an old joke about Calvin Coolidge when he was President The President and
Mrs. Coolidge were being shown [separately] around an experimental
government farm. When [Mrs. Coolidge] came to the chicken yard she noticed
that a rooster was mating very frequently. She asked the attendant how often that
happened and was told, "Dozens of times each day." Mrs. Coolidge said,
"Tell that to the President when he comes by." Upon being told, the President asked,
"Same hen every time?" The reply was,
"Oh, no, Mr. President, a different hen every time." President:
"Tell that to Mrs. Coolidge."
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coolidge_effect

Hoover wore a dress! "Quoted Susan L. Rosenstiel, a former wife of Lewis S. Rosenstiel,
chairman of Schenley Industries Inc., as saying that in 1958, she was at a party at the
Plaza Hotel where Hoover engaged in cross-dressing in front of her then-husband and
Roy Cohn, former counsel to Senator Joe McCarthy."
http://historynewsnetwork.org/article/814

Also "For example, on June 13, 1958, the head of the Washington field office informed
Hoover that, prior to marrying a member of Congress, the member’s wife had been
“having an affair with a Negro [and] also at one time carried on an affair with a
House Post Office employee.” More recently, the report said, the congressman’s wife
“endeavored to have an affair with [an] Indonesian, who declined.”
http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2011/08/02/fbi-director-hoover-s-dirty-files-excerpt-from-ronald-kessler-s-the-secrets-of-the-fbi.html

Einstein admitted he spent time with six other women while married.
http://www.nbcnews.com/id/13804030/ns/technology_and_science-science/t/new-letters-shed-light-einsteins-love-life

And Catherine The Great having 22 male lovers during her long life.
She was partial to handsome young men. She died in her bed, after a stroke.
It's just a matter what part of reality offends people, or knowing how short life is,
or that others are needed for others!
What part of the 22 male lovers supporting her, making her "The Great"
is not understood?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Legends_of_Catherine_the_Great

Sexuality of Abraham Lincoln?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sexuality_of_Abraham_Lincoln

The respected push and effort for the times, showing the need to push on and proceed!
Oscar Wilde! https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oscar_Wilde

George Borrow? "Borrow depicts an old man (Taylor) and a young man (Borrow)
discussing the merits of German literature, including Goethe's  
The Sorrows of Young Werther. Taylor confesses himself to be no admirer of either  
The Sorrows of Young Werther or its author but nevertheless states.
It is good to be a German (for) the Germans are the most
philosophical people in the world."
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/George_Borrow
In all affairs it's a healthy thing now and then to hang a question mark on the 
things you have long taken for granted. Bertrand Russell

Well history is an awful truth showing the light of today!
With the Ashley Madison attacks is nothing more than attacking human behavior.

"Most people don't want to assume cheating will be an issue in their relationship,
and so most people don't spend much time thinking about what they'd do if it happened.
And yet the existing statistics suggest it's pretty common. Research by
Geneviève Beaulieu-Pelletier, who studies relationships and infidelity at the
University of Montreal, estimates that the chances of someone cheating while
in a committed relationship range from 46% to 76%."

"The participants answered questions about the level of emotional trauma they had 
experienced, and they also took questionnaires designed to assess the amount of 
forgiveness that had transpired after the affair. The researchers used a three-stage 
model to define forgiveness: dealing with the impact, searching for meaning, and moving 
forward. Those who had crossed through all three stages were considered to have 
effectively forgiven their partners."

"The study volunteers also answered a survey that measured signs of posttraumatic 
growth, with questions that centered on five factors: their response to new possibilities, 
their relationships to others, their personal strength, the amount of spiritual change, 
and their appreciation for life."

"After analyzing the answers, the researchers found that forgiveness was the only 
significant predictor of posttraumatic growth. Put another way: It didn't appear to 
matter how deeply the trauma had affected them emotionally; what mattered was their 
capacity to forgive."

The capacity to forgive is going over the wall after that the growth happens.
Along with understanding who you are, what is not being met.
And that is a noted point is to forgive and movie forward noted in a push for Polyamory.
Accepting everyone as a group a extended family, so there is no more affairs as everyone
knows everyone long term. People go toward Polyamory to get into a better light.
Being open shows a caring nature to your partners nature that would be still not met
if you don't move on, as the reason for the affair would still be there.
https://polypdx.wordpress.com

Prayers and forgiveness does not help human needs being met, it will happen again! 
And that would be expected and norm as it takes actions to balance ones life.
You can't get balance without adding a little weight.
It's about the after forgiving saying what do you need that is the point!

Not fixing her needs ends badly! When the heat is on like at a 80% divorce
rate and her not getting support to cool down, you end up with the BS of
a red state in the dark mess! Not good being it's fixable but nothing is done to fix it!

Why have her blow her lid? Growth and support is needed!
A wife blowing her lid like that more likely won't happen if her two partners 
are hugging her now don't you think! Also stops any kind of abuse as the two are 
for her needs, and one or the other would put a stop to any abuse!
http://newsok.com/elementary-school-counselor-suspended-with-pay-during-investigation/article/5448874

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/okla-woman-ran-killed-husband-fight-cops-article-1.2227579


Being in the light there would be not much of an issue about the Ashley Madison hack,
as many would know you would be on there. I was on there before (( BOOM )) I omit it,
but I was to poor to use it! And I wanted to use it just to say hi, not date people.
Contact people I kind of  knew from the hotel days I worked. I'm supportive!
Like a reunion kind of thing.
http://walmartramen.blogspot.com/2014/02/banquet-servers.html

I would hope to see Ashley Madison add a Ployamory part to their site.
A need to grow up about it and it would be a better foundation!

Well be true about it, ask do you have a secret affair??????????????????
http://i.imgur.com/duXNC.jpg (Warning!)

Or do you go Polyamory!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
http://thefederalist.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/shutterstock_62663593-998x737.jpg

When I first hooked up with my old lady I found her on the web,
14 years ago. Different times but still you have to be real!
People are out there on those kind of sites and it's ok as everyone is human!

I fell in love with a married woman not on the internet and without Ashley Madison!
But I guess it's still a ping pong ball bouncing around, she's thinking about it I hope!
I hope they talk about it! We all love her!

It's about support, I'm there for her, it's just a woman's prerogative to decide.
Maybe in a few years? I'm ahead of my time!
Point noted look forward to a time people can treat others fair and understand
life is not a one way road shown with history!

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