Banquet Servers

(This is a disclaimer. This story has TMI. Just be aware!)
A biography of my hotel years!

I am sure you heard the saying before, "What happens at the Hotel stays at the Hotel!"

Why? Well it's to protect the hotels interest many rich people spend much time and
money at a hotel, so to keep other rich people or the press from getting info that
would distrust the rich person that would go to the hotel the bad behavior that person did
is hushed! Also it's just more of a hotel worker pride!

But some things are just too funny to hush. Like "some" of my stories! (Not all.)
I spent a lot of my time working at hotels and I worked at a country club for a short time.
I met many people famous and not, my view in the hotel was everyone is the
same money or not. In banquets there is a etiquette that is followed.
Women first etc. http://www.wisegeek.org/what-is-proper-serving-etiquette.htm
But to me a person with much money is the same as the other customers.
If you where rich you got served like everyone else! 

***I worked a banquet once and I had a table with the KOCH brothers.
At the time did did not know much about them this was the 90's.
I served them coffee, (If I ever knew!) but I treated them like everyone else.
Money did not out due the standard I was running by.

***I had champagne with Mamie Van Doren in the 90s! She was at the hotel at the

time and I ended up talking to her. She asked me if I wanted to go up to her room to have

champagne with her. I was 20 ish at the time and she was like in her 60's. 

Much to old for me it scared me so thinking she wanted to have sex with me and I

didn't want to reject her so I would end up being Hollywood gossip I told her 

"If you want to do something I think you want me to do, I can't I am recovering from 

a Hermina operation." Said oh I'm sorry still want champagne I said yes! 

I went into her room and saw the champagne bowl filled with ice. I saw the chill line 

so that looked good. The ice was melted and not melted. "The ideal temperature to store 

champagne is 45-65°F" So I opened the bottle for her poured her and me some. 

She had two glasses ready so I was for sure it was about sex. Later I found out she does like 

young men. And we talked she wanted to know any hotel stories I had. 

Told her I was too new to have many. So she did the talking. My life philosophy is based 

on my grandpas from the 1920's. The laws of nature etc. She agreed relating to something 

like Hollywood Mystic in her points of life. Told the story of George Harrison threw a drink 

at her by mistake. Said she looked at who did it and saw that George Harrison was like no, no, no! She said it was adorable of him. He didn't mean to get her. But the point what are the odds out of the whole unaverse George Harrison threw a drink on her, it's meaningful. Love and respect! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2SDOEaNs13M

***I sat in the 1 million $ Nissan Z car prototype an old Corvette ZR1 in the 90's.
I met Soichiro Honda. Honda was making their rounds talking about the new engines 
valve tec, that would change the world. He died a few months later, he knew his time
was short. The hotel maintenance guys put together a small putting green together
for him for the banquet. He was highly impressed at the American Ingenuity of that. 
No gaps, well made!
http://en.wikipedilisteninga.org/wiki/Soichiro_Honda

***I seen and talked to a few Clebs. I got tiger woods some water at a autograph
signing in the front lobby of the hotel he was doing. 
He is a nice guy human like everyone else.

***I was working a banquet once they had Dr Ruth as the speaker.
I was listening, I knew much of what she said relating to the psychology classes
I took in the 90's. Lovers bond etc, etc, but what blew my mind was this was the late 
90's and she was talking about "Butt Sex."
If you ever seen Dr Ruth in person I guess you will understand how funny this was.
It's like seeing your mom or someone like it talking about "Butt Sex." 
Funny TMI!

***In the late 90's I was working a banquet on a other building next door the hotel 
uses from time to time. I had to make a run to the hotel to get more coffee pots and 
when I got there there was this blond lady and two workers talking. 
So I kind of jumped in the conversation it was about like the 80's 
Pat Benatar vs Debbie Harry, I said I liked Debbie better or something like that. 
Being busy I ran back to the place I was working at and
a while later a other worker told me "Wow I heard you talked to Pat Benatar."
I said "WHAT?!" who knew she had blond hair, Pat to me had dark hair!
I ran back to the hotel but the banquet she was at was over.
Lately I found her Facebook page and posted a apology for not knowing
that was her at the hotel. I got no reply! Sorry Pat!

***In the 90's I had a hard time with a past High School girl I fell for.
We ran into each other in college and dated but my feelings where not her feelings.
I ran into her again at the Hotel I was working at. We went on a date again and
I found out she was moving to Chicago so this was a real downer!

That day I could not take off the day from work to go on a date all day.
I worked at a hotel and it was a big thing they had going on.

When I got there I found out it was a banquet with a famous lady actress from the 80's
I liked to watch. The show was about an Angel that lived in the closet, that would
come out to help a boy deal with things.

Sort of fitting! She was doing the motivational speaking thing there.
During her thing she came up to me and wanted to get my coffee pot so she could
run around to serve coffee to people, being motivational.
I quickly showed her how to do it safely without getting hot coffee on someone.
She later told me I was the first one that let her do it! Thanks she said.

***The hotel I worked at in the 90's had a petting zoo in the back of the hotel
parking lot for a function, some rodeo kind of guys working it got drunk and brought 
a donkey up to their room without anyone knowing. Fed it many nachos then went to
the other guys room and passed out. 

Well the house keeping girl came in to a horrific scene. 
The donkey had let loose all over the place and was resting on the bed. 
She came in and saw the mess all over then she looked at the bed only to see 
the donkey looking back at her. She screamed as she screamed the donkey 
stood up let loose all over the bed. She slammed the door shut and ran screaming 
all the way to the house keeping office, where at the time I was a dishwasher there. 
I saw her run down the back hallway screaming something about a burro, 
at the time it sounded like she said something about a burrito.
"Must be a bad Burrito." I said!" 

***In the 90's I was working at the Marriott hotel and we had a banquet server
from Haiti she told me she was a Voodoo Priestess there. One night I broke a light that
was close to the food tray I quickly cleaned it up but there was a piece of glass still
behind the tray and she cut her hand bad. When I got home after work, overnight
someone broke into my car. So the next time I saw her I apologized to her.
No disrespect I know there is more to life than we know! I wanted to hook up with her like to be her pet, her familiar but she said no! The Willlie BoBo song "Haitian Lady." was her song. A co worker had access to a drum kit at the hotel he did the tap, tap drum part for her once. An offering of respect! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GbG4FBVAq7k

***Back in the 90's there was a tragic comedy with a dishwasher and a goose! It happened before I worked there. There was a special needs dishwasher with a caseworker with him that was at the cater-out. And there was a pond with ducks and geese on the property. My co workers told me about it. They said he was eyeing the geese a lot when they where setting up so he had his eye on the goose for a long time. The banquet room was in a atrium with full view of the pond. Well the dish washer got away and ended up in the pond going after the goose. With everyone looking on he bit the goose by the neck and was pulling on it. The co-workers told me it was like a "Rubber Twizzler!" People went running and college girls that where there where freaking out crying etc. Tragic yes but part about the "Rubber Twizzler" along with afterward on the radio in the kitchen some songs came on relating to what happened points to it being funny. In the Air Tonight - "Well I was there and I saw what you did, I saw it with my own two eyes So you can wipe off that grin, I know where you've been It's all been a pack of lies." Hall and Oates - Changed song to what happen because the goose was on his list! - "(Because your GOOSE) your GOOSE is on my list Because your GOOSE is on my list of the best things in life!" Is it really wrong to LOL about it? It's sad it happened but... I found out I talked to the manager and they cooked more cookies for the staff at the place we worked at to smooth things over. It was a few years since the hotel did a cater out there, they were banned there after the goose incident. So I was working there for the first time since they where banned. * I need to note he was a special needs person and those thing are bound to happen sometime time to time.

***In the 90's there was a lady worker that was goofy, over sensitive.
"I don't like the way you eat food, I don't like the way you drink, don't like the way
you sit in the chair, etc..." She was bugging be once and she always carried a
note pad with her. So when she got on me again I told her a bunch of BS.
Like I cooked a dog on a grill. I told her I just threw it on the hot grill and closed
it real fast it yelled a lot but the dog was kind of good, but tough I said!

Sure enough she took the notes as I dished out the BS until she said no more.
I thought this was the end of her microscopic criticism. Until six years later when
I went to get another job, it turns out she took the papers to the NLRB so
they ended up being tagged to a file somewhere to me. When I went to the
job interview the boss was shocked at the file as he read on he figured
the lady had problems. He asked me if I cooked a dog on the grill? NO! LOL!
So I told him what happened six years ago. I didn't know anything about it
being on the NLRB. I don't know why no one told me anything.
That is how it is in my state. People like that back then I would just ignore
and let them burnout over their microscopic criticism.
"Let the crazies be crazies, can't make them not!"

***Also at Marriott hotel this table I was working at had a banquet was full
of sort of redneck / south women and they where bugging me
a lot, nothing was good for them. This lady at the table wanted something she said
hold out your hand, look at this, it was a over heated bread roll dry as anything.
I looked at it and there was a plant next to me at the time.
So I grabbed the plant lifting it up and threw the roll down in the bottom
of the pot and put the plant back and with my water pitcher gave it
some water and went on. She later got the banquet manager and
told him to look under the plant and he did I never seen him laugh so hard.
From that time on he would tell me to give no rubber biscuits out today!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jYyBZE0kBtE

Soon after the "Rubber Biscuit" incident I got put in to coat check.
We had some kind of banquet for lawyers. With me sitting at my table
at the coat check this drunk lady lawyer sat on my table and
we talked a bit. Well she did look kind of nice and her butt was on my table
so I ended up looking at her butt, when at that right moment the banquet manager
walked around the corner WTF! There I am looking at this ladies butt!
So the manager called me over there. What are you doing? LOL!
I told him she just sat down and I couldn't help it, look at her!
I remember he asked me what kind of car does she drive?
I said a BMW I think, and he told me go for it! But at the time I was 20
something, so I did not have a clue! I kind of wish that cougar would
of pounced on me because I missed out of a free spirit!
And I am sure I would of stabilized her more. It wasn't about money,
I saw it as she was a keeper. Like to have her in my life.
My life would be better also, as in balance the two would be on the same plank.
So the two would be the same. Something like that.
(Ladies we are clueless, women need to pounce sometimes, we don't know!)
But, not to be! I'm not meant to be with her.

***Also at the hotel in the 90's I was a bartender from time to time.
The cougar drink in the 90s was a Muppet.
"Pour equal parts tequila and 7-up into a shot glass.
Place palm over the glass,
hit it on the table (to stir), and shoot."

I had a drunk slurring 50ish lady ask me for a Muppet.
She was attractive and rich. So I couldn't help it.
I said "What do you want to do with that Muppet?"
Sort of flirting with her, like hitting on her.
She said "Im going to drink it......... Hey!"

This is a big no, no in the hotel you don't mess with
the rich people like that. But I couldn't help with a drunk cougar,
there is just something funny about it! Kind of hits your heart!

***Sad but there was a rich lady that sort of had a breakdown.
Her husband had passed away and she rented the top sweet for a month
with her hubs money. Well when she finally got booted out, ran out of money
they found out she painted a door on the wall and that was where her dead husband
would come out of the wall and talk to her. Before that was known the workers
just thought of her as strange. I ended up running a room service call at her room.
She wanted campaign and I ended up having to give it to her through
the crack of the door. She wouldn't open the door all the way. Oh the fun at work!

***When I was a dishwasher at a hotel I got put into a hotel restaurant manager job.
There was a lawsuit between two people that wanted the job.
The Judge put a hold on the job, told the hotel manager he could not hire anyone
new there. So in return the manager put me a dishwasher at the time in charge of the
restaurant. Right off the bat I had the waitresses on me for raises, and a budget issue
on my table. For a start I lowered the cost of Nachos to $5 that was good for the 90's!
I also had a door put in going to the bar, so the bar people could get in easier.
Kind of a good thing to do, but the noise came in and some drunks. 
(It was Oklahoma many people get drunk here!) I did not foresee that but still.

I had made the restaurant more money. Being I was a dishwasher that was good
for the job I did! The lawsuit fished and I had to leave the job, but all the staff wanted
me to stay at the job. But I could not stay being the lawsuit about the job held it
for the winner. So back to the dishwasher job I went for a bit before I moved to the 
banquet department later.

Later I found out they had the second highest dead peasant insurance amount in the 
state on me. In a way that helped me get many jobs as it showed value in me with the
willingness to invest that much in me! A $1.5 million insurance policy I think it was!
Some co-workers called me a "Dead man walking" Like the boss would kill me and 
get $1.5 million. It sort of got me paranoid for a small time, but all turned out well.

***Also when I was a dishwasher, me and the Vietnamese guy I worked with 
found some undeveloped film in the trash that came out of one of the rooms.
So he took it and had it developed. A few days later he came to work sounding 
like Bevius. ( We were the original Bevius and Butthead! )
 
He showed me the photos, they where of a tall skinny guy facing
some really big ladies. He was in a big diaper with a gun holster on and a cowboy hat. 
The two ladies had on diapers on too, but where sucking on pacifiers.
and next photo is of him pulling out his guns and like shooting the ladies.
The next photo was of the ladies on their backs with their legs in the air shaking them.
Then the last photo was of him blowing in the guns.
It did not show any acts of sex on the photos we had, but still very funny for
me and more funny for a foreigner. America what a country!

***Before my time at the hotel I worked at, there was a server I knew that caught
a hotel room on fire. The sterno for an chafer got to close to the curtain in one
of the rooms and then soon it set off the alarm so everyone on the floor went out
of their rooms and looked around the hallway then soon the sprinklers went on
one section at a time. The people looking down the hallway saw that the other
people down the hallway where getting wet and they laughed at them
then they got wet and then the people behind them laughed then 
they got wet. 

Everyone went outside! Outside the news crew was there and asked a him
what happened? He said he guessed it must be some ones buffet in one of
the rooms caught on fire. Turns out it was his room!
It was good he had humor about it.

Also noted before I met him I seen him on TV in the 90's. He was working for a
security comp and during a bike race in CA for some reason I forgot, he told me that he
ended up jumping his Jeep over a ditch close to the finish line and it was on TV. 
When I first saw the race on TV and saw that happen I said "What the Hell!" 
And years later when he said he did that in his past, I said "What the Hell!" Life is funny!

Working a early banquet breakfast they had a poached egg with their meal
in a ramekin on the plate. With him being tired this lady asked him what that was.
(We didn't know it's too early!) he told her it was sour cream.
Well a bit later she got to that part and found out it was a egg.
She said out loud "That's not sour cream that's an egg" and another guy
said who told you that. And at that right moment he came into the room
with coffee and the lady pointed at him and said "He said it, there he is right there!" 

***I worked the PGA in the 1990's. We had all the network executives around,
all the old time, new time gofers walking around. It was Caddy Shack, I lived it!
Tiger Woods and a old time gofer happened to come down the elevator to the lobby
at the same time. A bunch of fans came up to ask for autographs and they all went to
Tiger woods. And the old time gofer went up back to his room. It was just bad timing!

***In the early 90's I hung up on a bomb threat four times!
http://walmartramen.blogspot.com/2014/12/hanging-up-on-bomb-threat-4-times.html

***After a banquet during clean up this worker sort of redneckish lost his tray and it
tipped over too much and the glasses all fell, and broke.
I ran up to him in my banquet sever TUX and with a stupid / like it blew my mind redneck
look on my face said "God Damnnnnn, God Damnnnnn, God Damnnnnn"
The the boss said stop doing that. And I said ok sorry and went back to work!
And the co-worker laughed his ass off after that.
It was just one of those funny things out of the blue I did in the 90's.

***Also for the time in the 90's at the hotel there was a new lady that started
that night, she was ebony and being the humor of something like the brothers
(The Houseman) for the time, (You have to know how it was in the 90's)
I thought it would be funky, fucked up if I told her I was related to Jeffrey Dahmer,
even though I'm not. This was the 90's with all that he did coming out so I said...
"Ya I'm kind of down, well they said my cousin killed a bunch of people...
Jeffrey Dahmer, I don't know!" then I walked away with my head down!
Her eyes where bugged out! She was new and didn't know to believe me or not.
Just another thing I did out of the blue!

***In the late 90's we where working Easter brunch. Well this other co-worker
was going around serving coffee one table at a time going down the line.
That's how it works in a hotel. Well this "Fat lady" wanted coffee and she was rude
so he told her to "Chill out Lady." and before he could say anything else
her face turned red, her blood pressure was boom!
She stormed off asking where the manager was. "Manager, Manager?"
So he took off to the back and went upstairs where I was working a function.
And he told me what happened so really I did not want him
to get fired over a temporary issue so I switched places with him to give some
"Chill out time" I was hiding him! He really is not a bad, rude worker and that
lady sounded like to me had issues, workers don't need to walk on egg shells
at work! So being how Hotels work in real life I hid him!
Over a hour latter the lady was gone and things cooled down
and we switched back.

***In the 90's in the back storeroom of the banquet department I accidentally bumped
a helium tank making it tip over I didn't get to it in time and the valve hit just right on
a pallet knocking it off. The tank took off like a rocket ending up putting a small hole
in the wall. I ran for my life!

***The memories of the 90's the songs on the dance floor!
So go dancing you know I will! I heard these songs like at least 100 times at work
and they never got old. Yes I danced a few times at work.
 A good list at...
https://anthonyvecch.wordpress.com/2014/11/25/the-fifty-greatest-dance-songs-of-the-90s
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HEXWRTEbj1I
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LogL2pUiQmg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8nK1YQiaNEk 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WMPM1q_Uyxc
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LXEOESuiYcA

***Also in the 90's at a other property the hotel uses. I came to work once there
and found a hole in the wall with a black dot. It was a security camera!
I knew this because I sneaked around it and climbed on the ice machine looking
up in the ceiling tile I found a VCR and it was recording every 4 sec's so I timed my watch
to it and quickly came down. I then went to the prop room and found a tall black top hat.
And got in front of the camera and every 4 sec's I would jump in the air then quickly
move forward then jump again I did this around the whole big table then worked my
way back to the camera then in front of the camera I took off my top hat and tipped
it then before the VCR recorded again I took off running so it looked like I vanished.



A week later when I came to work the HR lady was looking at me with the eagle eye
As I walked by her office she seen the video. A few months later and a few paranoid
bosses later, I fixed it. I was in love with a Angie Dickinson lookalike and I knew it
bugged her and I got sick of it also so enough! I covered the hole with butter
being the color of the butter was the same color of the wall and respectfully the same as
her hair color. (Only I would notice something like that. When I get it bad I get it bad!)
Anyway the butter worked no more camera in the wall and no one said anything.

***Also at the other property the hotel uses there was a marriage and
a sort of a divorce the same day. This couple got marred and later that night they
had their reception at the hotel. The lady's husband got a little drunk, and a bit
aggressive. I sort of suspect he hit her or something, just by the way they where acting.
I picked up on it. He was upset that a beef roast got ruined because the hot box stopped
working. He wanted to take the roast back with him but Chef said it was not safe to eat.
So later when I went in the elevator I held it open for them, they where going down also.
So the wife, her parents and the drunk husband and me went down the elevator from hell!
We made it to the lobby, and when we got out the wife threw her ring to the floor.
The next day or week she filed for divorce. I remember it was soon after!

(Un-related sort of but I have to mention this the second time I seen something like that.
In the early 90's I was driving to college and on the highway I saw lady walking down
the side of the highway with a guy a ways behind her, they where fighting, yelling.
As I was coming up to them in my car she took off her ring and threw it in the grass.
Some asshole in front of me slammed on the breaks, pulling to the side of the road.
He open his passenger door and she jumped in. I thought about doing that also but
I hesitated, I was in college so I was broke with no money and could not take care
of her if I did! So it was ok. I hope the guy that picked her up took care of her!)

***Before the year 2000 I heard from another hotel worker about something called the
"Concorde Club" in Oklahoma. AKA Swingers club. At the time people where
partying like it's 1999! And this was just another funny thing going on at the time to me.

I was cleaning up after a banquet and the mic was still on and running, so with no
customers in the room just workers I got on the mic and said,
"The first annual meeting of the Concorde Club is now in session
the honorable **** presiding!" and went boom, boom with a coffee cup.
This guy and his wife poked their heads in the room and looked at me he said
"He said it!" And she looked sort of disused and shocked that I said it.
I guess they knew about it also! It was just too funny for me but told them
sorry!

***In the mid 90's This RICH lady whose husband runs an oil refinery headquarters,
was seen at the hotel by her husband she was going up the elevator with her arms
around two guys. Well he only seen the back of her and was sure it was her,
but not 100% so he asked the bellman and front desk if they knew if she
was there. They didn't know but they quickly passed the info to the hotel manager.
Being the guy runs the oil refinery headquarters and is over 60% of the hotels money
at the time the manager looked in to it.

He found her, she was having a orgy with a bunch of people in a upstairs sweet.
The manager and security got the people to get dressed and got them out the
hotel in the stairwell. They kept the wife there as she was a match on fire
and they where thinking what to do to get her out of the hotel without her husband
seeing her. Also to the fact all she had on was a crotch less lace S&M outfit.
Because one of the people there took her clothing on the way out.

So that was where I came in I was working on the floor at the time.
The manager got me and told me what was going on and we need to
get her out without her husband seeing her. It's death of the Hotel because
he would pull all of the business away for sure.
We can't go down the main elevator or take the stairwell because you still would
have to walk across the main lobby hallway to get to the parking lot exit.
There was a service elevator that went to the lobby and that was the way they
where going to take her out. Being it was close to the parking lot exit.

But how without being seen because her husband was standing in the middle
of the lobby looking at everything to see where she comes out at.
What to do? I came up with a pink panther kind of movie thing, of hiding her in the
Rubbermaid cart with a cloth over it. But when she got in there was too many sharp
plastic things in there hurting her so she refused!
So I came up with option two, duck walk next to the cart so it hides her so we
can get her down the lobby hallway a bit to get her to the parking lot exit, where
the bellman had her car in the back of the hotel ready for a fast exit.



So with the cart stacked with trays and covered with the cloth and her car ready
and with the manager and security guard ahead on the lookout we ran to the
service elevator. Where at the lobby floor I went out first and moved my
cart over a bit and at a sight angle me and the duck walking wife
with the crotch less lace S&M outfit walking next to the cart walked toward the exit.
(Yes I had to look what guy wouldn't! I was under 30 at the time!)
I was looking at her when the security guard tapped me and I said
"I can't help it it's beautiful" then wife whispered "thank you" and then
the manager coughed "BS!" And the wife said "hey!"
By then we got close enough where her husband couldn't see and the
security guard picked her up over his shoulder and they ran her to the car.
I gave her the call me hand language as they where going down the hall to the exit.
And she gave me the hands up, I can't hand language back! Damn!

After that mess the manager gave me or the talk about what happens
in the hotel stays in the hotel! And after that the manger got all the sales people
together we need more business now! And the hotel lives another day!

***In the 90's I was a part of the (A-team!) If there was a issue they would call
for security and us. For us it would be mostly be like offering free dry cleaning
if coffee got on a ladies expensive coat, or a free dozen of cookies for the coffee
bar. What ever that would mend a issue to keep them coming back.

One night I got a call about a naked man in the hallway up stairs hiding in the
ficus trees in the hallway. So getting the call off I reluctantly went. Security wanted
me to block the hallway but too many people where coming and going something
had to be done. The issue was he was a guy that was having sex with a married lady
that goes to the hotel a lot I knew her from the hotel. He tried to stick it up her butt
and she pushed him out in the hallway locking him out naked where he only had
the ficus trees to hide. So I asked him whats going on he told me and who she was
I said I knew her so I took over this issue. Security was interested in seeing how
I would handle this I guess.

I knocked at her room and door and said "HI this is... that works in banquets."
She said she knows me. So I said it in one breath "What happens in the hotel stays
in the hotel but we can't keep it in the hotel if there is a naked man in the hallway
please give him his pants back!" She said "He tried to stick it up my ass!" I replied
"I didn't want to know that... Please!" Long pause then she threw his clothes through
the crack of the door. He put on his clothes, checked his wallet and I told him to please
don't do this again go away! And I told her this is staying in the hotel!
Well because of the money of her and her husband I was protecting the hotels
best interest buy keeping this hush knowing this mess more likely would keep
her from doing it again!

***Way back at a unknown time or location at a cater out we where working.
I witnessed a lovers connection. All I am going to say is a worker was in love
with a customer. She hangs out at the workplace a lot I guess while hub is at work.
We where tired and resting against the wall while the people where socializing.
Me and the worker where quiet when all of a sudden he said out loud
"I wish I could be her toy boy!" I looked at him, "WHAT?! LOL"
He looked at me and said "Did I say that out loud?", I said "Well Yess!"
and he said "Oh, Shit! "Then he looked at her and she was looking
at him and you could read her face, "I love you too!", Oh Shit!" He got embarrassed
and walked by the wall going to the exit. And she saw him and she went also on the
wall on the other side of the room. I was standing there watching this go down.
It was like a cougar hunting pray! No, really! 
They both where about half way to the door when they stopped and made eye
contact, contact, contact then he took off running to the exit making it out.
And she took off supper fast to the exit, she paused and looked around
no one really noticed what was going on but me and she looked at me.
I was smiling, this was sort of romantic.
(Totally Humanistic Psychology, worth it's wight in gold!)
Then she looked like fuck it and took off after him.
I didn't see what happened but from seeing her at the place I worked at
I am sure she tackled him. (Her attitude etc.)
I made my way to the exit but did not see them anywhere when I looked.

***Also in the early 90's when I was a dishwasher in my 20's me and the
other worker heard this lawyer group was running room to room naked.
(They had the whole floor.)
Security had the service elevator and stairs locked down.
We both where trying to get up there, we want to see!

***Also as I dishwasher there was a married lady that had a open
marriage or something, that worked in the restaurant. She liked me...
She once wanted me to get her keys our of her front pocket because
her hands where full. So I did, but I quickly found out she had no
pockets they where cut out I felt something furry.

I was interested in her until... The cold prep cook came to
work and went to me in a panic knowing my interest with her.
He told me what happened to him. That he made a agreement
and he had sex with her. He was on top when all of a sudden she
hugged him and wrapped her legs around him holding him down
and yelled out "He's Ready!" He looked over his shoulder and said
the bedroom door opened and her husband was walking toward his ass,
with his thing hanging down wobbling. He could not get free so the only thing he
could do was to flop around in the bed like a dolphin with her hanging on
to him, until they fell off the bed, then he put his ass against the wall and said
"This is not our agreement!" He told me this so it wouldn't happen to me.

***Also in the 90's there was a worker that had a Corpus callosotomy done.
He had some conflict. He told me his "Right brain is jealous of the left
because the right hand does all the work."
There was onetime he hit himself with the left hand.
I had to know what eye - side of the brain to look at to tell
him to knock it off. He thanked me for that!

But overall he was a happy guy! He had his bad times, but
found happiness by carrying two trays of food one in each hand.
"Im happy!" he said. The boss didn't like that but I pulled out
my old college books and showed her, hes not normal and needs
not to be chained to a standard due to his needs!

***As you know Hotels are always willing for your business but no donkey please!
All of this kind of stuff is normal when you work in a hotel.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XhdBfQMFk3c

All of this stuff looks bad to someone that had a sheltered life.
I have to say to look at it in "Humanistic / Self-Actualization." view
Like in Maslow, the "B-Love" without deficiency! "A mystical experience" etc.
Life can not be sheltered, so life happens. It makes life worth living!

People call me Crazy, The power of love and the Male Concubine

There is times in life where you found it. The galaxy has more to it
than we all know and if you are too stupid to know it... I don't know what to say!
I recognize things that have value, fit, comparable, compatible, complete 
each other. Love is on a different plane and love has no boundaries!
And that is the point love!

The power of love? That Powerful, Universal, Governing Force is Love!
http://walmartramen.blogspot.com/2017/01/albert-einstein-that-powerful-universal.html

Me? I am polyamorous having feelings for a married lady / red string of fate,
love. It is embedded like a screw in the floor a galaxy pointing type of thing.
As it is not being selfish to love an other as the point is the other not yourself!
So I accept it as being with her is where we all should be able to start 
a new day together. Noting she loses nothing but gains better grounding,
making all on a better ground!

In the bible days there where many concubine.
"CONCUBINE, marital companion of inferior status to a wife."
Give women are no longer property as they where in the bible days.
Women as I see it can have concubine also and for me thats ok. 
I would like to be as I am polyamorous, loving with no boundaries, 
a male concubine to the wife is ok!
"CONCUBINE, marital companion of inferior status to a husband!"
http://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/concubine

Religion is really not what it seems and it's changing to
be more in fit with reality.
https://walmartramen.blogspot.com/2015/03/heaven-does-turn-on-light-for-atheism.html

"People call you crazy?" Well lets talk about that! With the love and support
the galaxy putting you there without being there, there would be no there pointing
to the significant others in your life. Without your male concubine to shine the way!

Crazy? No!

Consensual nonmonogamy and the long road together.

In life to be in a polyamorous relationship you know that takes
effort and that effort is a setting for a long term relationship in that it
should. Building trust in the wife and her husband and for you the
trust of them points to the long run.

It's about love! Sitting down and looking at the pain you might of
had in your relationships you might of thought about it why have
pain, why not talk, work it out. There is that point in life to let out
your pain and grow up about who you are.

This is nothing new love has no boundaries and needed like
the sun to life. We all need love to grow!
http://walmartramen.blogspot.com/2015/03/going-triad-into-21st-century.html

In that is respect for Carrie Jenkins for asking the difficult questions,
reflecting in her own life. Needed to point to people to grow up!

~~~~~Maybe Monogamy Isn’t the Only Way to Love
In the prologue to her new book, What Love Is and What It Could Be, philosopher Carrie Jenkins is walking through Vancouver, from her boyfriend’s apartment to the home she has with her husband. She wonders at how the romantic love she experiences firsthand is so different than the model presented by popular culture and academic theory alike. “If indeed romantic love must be monogamous, then I am making some kind of mistake when I say, ‘I’m in love with you’ — meaning romantically — to both my partners,” she writes. “I am not lying, because I am genuinely trying to be as honest as I can. But if romantic love requires monogamy, then despite my best intentions, what I’m saying at those moments is not, strictly speaking, true.”

Her book examines the long, sometimes awkward legacy of philosophers’ thinking on romantic love, and compares that with a new subfield in close-relationships research — consensual nonmonogamy, or CNM. While singers and thinkers alike have been riffing on a “one and only” for decades, she argues that space is being made in the cultural conversation to “question the universal norm of monogamous love, just as we previously created space to question the universal norm of hetero love.” These norms are more fluid than they appear: In Jenkins’s lifetime alone, same-sex and cross-ethnicity relationships have become common.

When I asked Jenkins to describe how it feels to have both a husband and a boyfriend — she rejects the “primary relationship” moniker altogether — she said that it’s like having more loving relationships in your life, like a close family member or friend. She and her boyfriend, whom she’s been with for about five years, used to work in the same building; he was teaching creative writing on the floor above her philosophy department, though they didn’t meet until they matched on OkCupid. While both men have met each other, they’re not close; Jenkins describes the relationship as having a “V shape,” rather than a triangle. Both helped in the development of the book: husband refining philosophical arguments; boyfriend editing the writing, and helping her to sound like a normal person, rather than an academic.

Still, CNM faces lots of stigma; even the study of it is stigmatized. Yet in the limited yet rich vein of research out there, the evidence suggests that it’s a style that, in some populations, leads to greater relationship satisfaction than monogamy. In any case, the researchers tell me, the insights into what makes more-than-two relationships work can be applied to any given dyad, given the communicative finesse required when three or more hearts are involved.

In a forthcoming Perspectives in Psychological Science paper, Terri Conley, a University of Michigan psychologist who’s driven the field, defines CNM as “a relational arrangement in which partners agree that it is acceptable to have more than one sexual and/or romantic relationship at the same time.” That’s distinguished from the “polygamy” practiced by some religious groups, where it’s not always clear whether wives can opt out of the relationship.

I was surprised to discover how common it is: A 2016 study of two nationally representative samples of single Americans — of 3,905 and 4,813 respondents, respectively — found in each case that about one in five people had practiced it during their lifetime. A 2016 YouGov poll found that 31 percent of women and 38 percent of men thought their ideal relationship would be CNM in some way. Other research indicates that around 4 to 5 percent of Americans in relationships are in some sort of CNM, be it swinging, where partners have sex with people outside their relationship at parties and the like; an open relationship, where it’s cool to have sex with other people but not grow emotionally attached to them; or polyamory, where both partners approve of having close emotional, romantic, and sexual relationships outside of the couple itself. People are curious, too: From 2006 to 2015, Google searches for polyamory and open relationships went up. Other data points to how sticking to the boundaries of monogamy doesn’t come easily to lots of people: A 2007 survey of 70,000 Americans found that one in five had cheated on their current partner.

Jenkins says that as a tenured philosophy professor at the University of British Columbia, she’s in a unique, privileged position to openly talk about being in a nonmonogamous marriage. She’d been interested in being in more than one relationship ever since she can remember, but it used to seem like some sort of impossible dream situation — she didn’t realize it could be an option in her real life until she was about 30. (She’s now 37.)

Jenkins met her husband, Jonathan, who’s also a philosopher, back in 2009, at a philosophy workshop that he organized at the University of St. Andrews in Scotland; they later got married in the same hall the conference took place. They took one another’s last names as middle names.

Now married for almost eight years, they talked about polyamory early on, though defining the relationship that way came later. As philosophers are wont to do, they soon wrote a bit of a manifesto about their arrangement. They observed that even if their wedding guests were woke in any number of ways — not batting an eyelid if a colleague was gay or bi, eschewing heteronormative assumptions, and the like — there’s still the shared assumption that a nonmonogamous relationship is less sexually safe and less committed than a regular ol’ monogamous one. “[E]ven our very liberal pocket of our relatively liberal society is massively — and, to us, surprisingly— mononormative,” they write. “Acquaintances, friends, and colleagues are constantly assuming that our relationship, and indeed every relationship that they think of as ‘serious’, is a sexually monogamous one.”

To Jenkins, the biggest struggle with polyamory isn’t from managing multiple relationships — though Google Calendar is a crucial tool — but rather the strong, sometimes violently negative reactions that she gets, especially online. When I spoke with her by phone, she was struck by a comment to a YouTube interview of hers, where a pseudonymous user invited “everyone” to read her column in the Chronicle of Higher Education about having multiple loves.

“THIS WOMAN IS A DISGUSTING ANIMAL,” the troll wrote. “Every bit as twisted and queer as the Mormons with their multiple lives [sic]. This femme-pig is the spectral opposite of Trump; a far far left-wing freak that desires to completely overthrow Western Christian Civilization.” Jenkins walked me through a deep reading of the bile: Bundling in politics — the “left-wing freak” bit — with the monogamy norms signals to her that there’s a judgment of what it means to be a good person in here, since politics is about living correctly, collectively. Plus “if you’re an animal, you’re out of the range of humanity,” she says. She’s also gets a lot of “get herpes and die, slut” suggestions, she says, which speaks to the hypersexualization of CNM. Nonmonogamy leads to lots of sex, the presumption goes, and with that STIs, and it proceeds from there. The way news articles covering CNM tend to be illustrated with images of three or four people in a bath or bed doesn’t help, either.

“The way we normally think about romantic love, we don’t imagine that it’s entirely about sex,” she says. “For a lot of people sex is a part of it; if we’re just having a hookup or a friend with benefits, we don’t call that romantic love. When it comes to polyamorous relationships, if you’re in love with more than one person, the same applies — to fall in love with someone is not the same as to sleep with them. We’re clear with that distinction in monogamous relationships, but in CNM that distinction between love and sex gets collapsed.”

In that forthcoming Perspectives in Psychological Science paper, Conley finds that 103 participants recruited online thought that researchers who wrote positive things about polyamorous people were more biased — in line with recent data indicating that when laypeople read about research that conflicts with their social identity, they’re more likely to think the scientists doing the work are biased.

Researchers who have studied stigma around CNM have found lots. In a 2012 paper, Conley and her colleagues found that monogamous relationships were better rated on every metric by different sets of the population, including nonmonogamous people. When 132 participants recruited online read relationship vignettes that were identical except for one being monogamous and the other not, the CNM was seen as riskier sexually, more lonely, less acceptable, and having a lower relationship quality. People in CNM were also seen as worse with non-relational things, like making sure to walk their dog or paying their taxes on time. Amy Moors, a co-author on the paper, says it had some of the biggest effect sizes she’s seen in her research. Elisabeth Sheff, a leading polyamory researcher who left academia for lack of grant funding, now frequently serves as an expert witness in custody battles; she says that often a grandmother or a former spouse will find out that a co-parent has multiple relationships, be scandalized, and demand to take the kids — even though her longitudinal research, reported in The Polyamorists Next Door: Inside Multiple-Partner Relationships and Families, indicates that kids who grow up in polyamorous families aren’t any more screwed up than average American children.

That same paper finds that there were no differences in relationship functioning between monogamous and nonmonogamous couples. People in CNM had lower jealousy and higher trust and higher sexual satisfaction with their partner. Polyamorists were more satisfied than people in open relationships, perhaps because it’s hard to block of feelings for people you sleep with frequently. Polyamorous people were a special case, with higher satisfaction, commitment, trust, and passionate love than monogamous individuals, and higher sexual satisfaction. CNM people also had higher sexual satisfaction with their secondary partners than their primary partners, though that difference fell away when controlling for relationship time, with primary relationships averaging three times the length of secondary relationships.

“Overall, the standard for human responses for relationships is habituation,” Conley says. “That involves a loss of sexual attraction, and we can tell that from stats from therapy. And to the extent that a couple is frustrated sexually, it spills over to other parts of life.”

The Type of People Who Are the Best Fit for Nonmonogamous Relationships
Angelina’s Divorce Shows How ‘Failed Marriages’ Are Failing Us
There are other explanations for high satisfaction scores for polyamorous people, she adds. It could be that they’re just acting out a social desirability bias, given that they’re participating in a study about CNM and want the lifestyle to look good; it could also be that people who enter into polyamory have self-selected themselves into a hypercommunicative population — all the poly self-help books emphasize the need to explicitly talk things out. “People interested in polyamory are more relationship-y than the average person,” she says. “They like thinking about relationships, talking about relationships. That’s great in monogamy, but needed in polyamory.”

All this suggests the kind of people that are the right fit for CNM. Beyond being relationship-y, a Portuguese study out this year found that people with a high sociosexuality, or disposal to casual sex, had less relationship satisfaction when in a monogamous relationship, but those effects disappeared if they were in CNM. Still, they were just as committed to their relationships — signaling that exclusivity and commitment may not be one and the same. Harvard sexologist Justin Lehmiller has found that people who are more erotophilic — i.e., that love sex — will be a better fit for CNM; same with if they’re sensation-seeking.

Amy Moors, the Purdue psychologist, has found that people with higher avoidant attachment — where you’re just not that into intimacy — have positive feelings about and a willingness to engage in polyamory, but they were less likely to actually partake of it. While a correlational study, Moors explained that from a subjective perspective, it makes sense: “When you have avoidant attachment, you like a lot of emotional distance, physical distance, time by yourself,” Moors says, which is not a fit for the relationship-y remands of a poly lifestyle. Also, there’s reason to believe that folks who have relational anxiety, and are thus sensitive to separation, might be prone to the jealousy that’s known to flare up in CNM, though it’s not like that doesn’t happen in monogamy, too.

What motivated Jenkins to write What Love Is, she says, was a gap — or silence — in the philosophical literature, that polyamory was rarely discussed or even acknowledged as a possibility. “Noticing these philosophical silences and denials, while simultaneously being made aware of how society at large viewed me for being a polyamorous woman, made me realize there was something important here that I needed to do,” she says. “To do it meant bringing my personal life and my philosophical work into a conversation with one another. The familiar slogan says that the personal is political, but the personal is philosophical, too.”

Two key themes emerge from reading the book: that love is dual-layered, with social scripts overlaying evolutionary, physiological impulses. And that the “romantic mystique,” like the feminine one before it, assumes that love is mysterious and elusive and corrupted from examination — a sentiment that protects the status quo. But with investigation, and conversation, the mechanics of love reveal themselves, and norms can change socially, and be tailored locally. Like Jenkins, you can custom-fit your relationships to your life — if you dare to talk about them.
http://nymag.com/scienceofus/2017/03/science-of-polyamory-open-relationships-and-nonmonogamy.html

Porn helps culture, Low Sex, Low Dopamine, Need to Know!

In these days I just don't know what is going on. There seems to be a planed pushed
attack on the Internet. Like a point of a Bilderberg Group meeting. Might be?!

There seems to be a push to control the Internet. Net neutrality lost.
The Dark Web is being shut down. But new ones will pop up all the time.
The Dark Web needs to grow up, yes they only did it to themselves...
The uneducated ones on there doing the stupid. The Dark Web needs to be more
useful to everyone! Anyway...
https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2017/jul/20/dark-web-marketplaces-alphabay-hansa-shut-down

There is a push in the UK to stop porn! "Porn warps culture. I hope credit-card checks
nudge adults out of the habit."
https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2017/jul/20/porn-warps-culture-credit-card-footprint

Well Porn does not warp culture! It's the main human motivation of who we all are.
Humans and Animals are made with hormones and they are the ruling factor of 
how we act! So trying to stop porn is on the level of being uneducated. 
Like kids not having that talk, or sex education. Kids going to adults getting married, 
having sex. Does the male know that it takes most females a longer time to have a 
orgasm. Where the male gets done in five Minutes and lets the wife bake as he 
goes to sleep! Even plants have fun! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9CyviFJ8zDs 

So you get the point of the point of Porn helping for what it is.
Give I do think Porn needs to push on more like education on a woman's
Bio needs for the viewers! In that kids that will seek out their own answers
should get a heads up from Porn, it's not about you, it's about others!
It's their bodies and they should know others also in function.
What is dopamine to who, you?

Not having sex, relates to having low Dopamine. Living a life of zombie with
your body in action is stupid! Or like a Absexual trait only in their mind!
"folks who get off complaining about sex and trying to censor porn."
On on the same basis of "Sadomasochist Republicans" on the point they
vote against their best interest. Republicans don't like the poor other than
getting votes from them. Yet they go along with the food stamp cuts etc.
Driving a tore up car from the 90's poor as hell with a Republican
bumper sticker on it. Why do you drive poor again?
The confederate flag on their tore up truck and home.
Why don't you see a confederate flag on a three story house or
Mercedes? They are not slaves! So the others must be talking about 
themselves they are the slaves! Wage Slave!

Stop confusing the conservatards. No! Conservatism should not exist!
We can not make it if we are against our own people. 
The one brings down the many. Low pay = consumer based pricing.
Less food stamps less food bought and less food stamp money for businesses!
No mandate for health insurance making others pay for the uninsured, 
making others pay for it! So why not get rid of the mandate to have car insurance!
If people have to pay for the healthcare uninsured why not car uninsured?

All deflates... Why are they on the same level of Absexual, they like to suffer.
Why would they like better pay they might be able to buy something, 
they don't want that? They want to drive a bad car they like it!
Absexual, they like it! They are both in the same fighting their own nature!

Living a life of Absexual and, or a Sadomasochist with a bad car, 
is the same with humans that are sexual beings ran by hormones 
is just stupid to fight your own nature, nature wins!
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carol_Queen

~~~~~“My school friend had to show me how to use a condom by rolling it down the stick shift of her car; it’s a miracle I knew how to use one,” Maine tells me in London, where she now lives. In her autobiographical short film Yes, God, Yes, the film-maker provides a snappy, hilarious and frank portrayal of a teenage girl discovering masturbation and sexuality in an unnamed Midwestern Catholic community in the late 90s, when the internet suddenly arrived in people’s homes, presenting a mystifying world of possibility.

In little more than 10 minutes, this film gets at the hypocrisy present not only in Catholicism, but in all religions and adult life in general; the idea that most people don’t practice what they preach. “Realizing adults are not infallible is always a turning point,” says Maine. It’s one she handles with care – and just the right amount of cringing.
https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/shortcuts/2017/jul/20/yes-god-yes-the-film-nailing-teenage-sexuality

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rjjh9PML8tE

"The idea that most people don’t practice what they preach." comes to mind
of your hormones and the need for Dopamine in our bodies!
There is a lot of mental illness in acting stupid, fighting your own body,
needs! The point of like is really the Dopamine, a drug cocaine that
we all need or we become ill!

 ~~~~~Hormone Imbalance, Not Bipolar Disorder
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/attention-please/201310/hormone-imbalance-not-bipolar-disorder

~~~~~Poor Neurotransmitter Activity Linked to Mental Illnesses
https://www.elementsbehavioralhealth.com/mental-health/poor-neurotransmitter-activity-linked-to-mental-illnesses

~~~~~Have You Stopped Enjoying Life? Could Be Low Dopamine
http://suzycohen.com/articles/depression_low_dopamine

~~~~~Poverty harms brain?
But most importantly here is what a stress was considered by the authors.
http://earth-chronicles.com/science/poverty-harms-brain.html

Give her a glass of water. Is it worth it, let me work it!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cjIvu7e6Wq8

I said get her a glass of water!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lcOz6i2A_CQ

Fuck the chicken coop and make a Tiny House (Woman cave) together

If you love, you love openly as closed love is as the same as a plant not getting light.
This story is about bonding together, as you can't have one without the others!

A woman I love from work gave me a plant when she left. 
I still have it. I took it home like her love. God I'm love sick!

But the point is to love, let the love grow. You add light water,
you do something!!! Love takes that effort, you talk and you grow!

Love is like the point of the marriage vows. "For better, for worse"
The point to make better! If you love her you don't make more work
for her! You are to make her life better.

Not the "I love you so much here is a chicken coop to take care of."
Not that you have papers to file, reports to do, doing that 
voodoo, that you do, so well! Go feed the chickens!

Really that did happen to the lady I love. Her husband made a chicken
coop. When she told me I told her "I'm sorry!" I knew she needs a 
Tiny Gypsy House, a woman cave for a place of her own!
That is in a woman's nature anyway and should of been recognized
by her husband she has needs! That is like not watering the plant!!

There is that point to ask what really is the wife's needs!
And work it out! Being open, the wife having a other.
Like water and sun to a plant! How is she to grow without?

It's true and noted as "Fuck the chicken coop and make a 
Tiny House (Woman cave) together." Such a good time for
all to talk, work things out, build the tiny house together.
In psychology terms it's said, "Show her the tiny gypsy house."
Show her the effort for her!

~~~~~Polyamory often involves a chain of interconnected, long-term relationships—but it can come in other flavors, like a committed open marriage between two “primaries” who take on “secondary” partners when they feel like it; or something more like a group marriage. The lingo—and there’s a lot of it—goes like this: a three-person relationship is a “triad,” a four-person is a “quad,” and a five-some is a “W,” for the five points on the letter. And while many of the older folks in the poly community dabbled in “swing clubs” at some point in their personal battle against monogamy, poly is not swinging, which is more about a night of random party-sex. Poly is not, as some people think, an all-you-can-eat sex buffet—or it can be a sex buffet, if the sex comes with hours and hours of sensitive discussions and eventually introducing your new sex partner to your boyfriend over muffins at Starbucks.
http://www.nerve.com/behind-the-scenes/a-surprising-weekend-inside-the-touchy-feely-world-of-polyamory

But note it does not have to be sex! That is a matter of agreement. 
Me I am ok just supporting, dating, making better.
It's better than going off that cliff of insanity!

Carol Queen and Relating

Carol Queen is far beyond our time! Pointing to the stagnation of society 

to these days getting out of the 1950's into the now!

~~~~~Carol Queen is an American author, editor, sociologist and sexologist active in the sex-positive feminism movement. Queen has written on human sexuality in books such as Real Live Nude Girl: Chronicles of Sex-Positive Culture. She has written a sex tutorial, Exhibitionism for the Shy: Show Off, Dress Up and Talk Hot, as well as erotica, such as the novel The Leather Daddy and the Femme. Queen has produced adult movies, events, workshops and lectures. Queen was featured as an instructor and star in both installments of the Bend Over Boyfriend series about female-to-male anal sex, or pegging. She has also served as editor for compilations and anthologies. She is a sex-positive sex educator in the United States.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carol_Queen

Relating? Back in 1998 when the movie Bend Over Boyfriend came out.

I was working in a Hotel and there was a Angie Dickinson lookalike 
co worker I fell for. People at work knew my interest for her and her situation.

One day there where a few workers that told her to me

"Bend Over Boyfriend!" At the time I didn't know what the hell that was!

But she looked at me and I looked at her, back and forth, 

and the co workers where LOL! Funny! They called me bend over boyfriend
for a while. But I didn't know why! We didn't do that but it was funny
that the co workers would of thought of that, like a yep, yep kind of thing!
I was seen as pussy wiped by her. Not really! She was married so I did not
own her, so she owned me! It was a rules of engagement kind of thing!

Also we where working a banquet with Dr Ruth as the speaker.
At the time she was talking to older couples on bonding practice.
She was talking about anal sex. We both where in the room working
and I was really in love with her that day. As Dr Ruth was talking
I was adoring my Angie Dickinson lookalike. I noticed something big
was on her mind as she was standing there and I was standing there
also, looking at her. Dr Ruth noticed our interaction and she sort of paused
during her speech. That sort of snapped my Angie Dickinson out of it
and she noticed I was looking at her lovingly, now aware what is going on,
wondering about my intent to what Dr Ruth was talking about
my Angie Dickinson shook her head, NO! And I think I shrugged my
shoulders in a DAMN manner! 

I also had a girlfriend that had multiple personality disorder.
We where having sex once when all of a sudden she rolled me over
and got on top of me in the missionary position but with her as the man
and me as the woman. I liked this a lot! And was worried, who was this guy
I never seen him before. Relating to a unknown personality out of her.

But such is life! These days? Life is too short to not be open!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bbj8F5tE9vk

From your past you learn and know you 
"You can't win the lottery if you don't buy a ticket!"
So you get out there and do it because love is worth it!

Hormone Imbalance, Poor Neurotransmitter Activity Linked to Mental Illnesses

Poor Neurotransmitter activity?

My sociology instructor in college, either from a binge
or bugged about social changes at the time liked to say.
"Your mind is only mushed as the corn field you live in."
For the time my instructor was talking about the lack of
environmental stimulus, relating to living out in the backwoods.
Simple life, simple minded. Retardation by deprivation?

Is it a non educated environment where no education is valued,
and gets passed on to family members. Somewhat true.
It's also that they could never afford their education in the first place.
Being it's like building credit to poor people. It takes money to
have credit as you have to buy something.

Deprivation does push mental illness. In part lacking life
experience's to relate a issue in life with. They have nothing to 
relate it to so accordingly there is a panic and all that follows.
Training the brain to be psychotic?

It's like that attitude like the saying "The wife starts a yelling,
I go a fishing." Letting the wife go to her own devices training
her brain to be psychotic! True and the point is to ask why! 
Why? So it can be changed!!!!

Life's stupidity, deprivation, and all that is bad effects. 
Poor Neurotransmitter activity from something that is in and out 
of people's hands.

To help with no money to keep your mind busy is no problem.
Just do something! It does not have to cost a lot!
There are things you can do the point is try!
http://walmartramen.blogspot.com/2013/11/environmental-stimulus-kids-in-road-of.html

Poor Neurotransmitter activity from something that is in and out of people's hands.

~~~~~Poor Neurotransmitter Activity Linked to Mental Illnesses
Understanding the way neurotransmitters function in the brain could lead to better treatments for mental disorders. Normally, nerve impulses move along the brain through axons , long cellular structures – until they land at a presynaptic membrane. These membranes house the neurotransmitters that will be sent out into free spaces, or synaptic clefts, so that they can be collected by receptors of another neuron. The neuron that collects the neurotransmitter then internalizes it and the nerve impulse can keep moving forward with the message.

If serotonin or norepinephrine movement is interrupted, depression or anxiety disorders can result, as these hormones (also called neurotransmitters) regulate things like mood, appetite and concentration. For patients with depression, the neurotransmitters may return to their original location (the presynaptic membrane) instead of sending the right message produced by the serotonin to a neuron. Medications for depression can help stop these hormones from returning to their original location, a process called reuptake. The result is that broken signals are repaired; there is more serotonin activity; and reduced symptoms for depression.

Dopamine is another neurotransmitter linked to mental illness, such as  schizophrenia, characterized in part by emotional disturbances, but certain medications can help reduce the symptoms. Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) is also believed to be a result of interrupted passages of dopamine or norepinephrine. Tiredness, high levels of stress and poor motivation are also linked to low dopamine.

Additional mental illnesses, such as personality disorders and social disorders, are believed to be caused by the interrupted transfer of neurotransmitter messages. In patients with drug or alcohol addictions, the gamma-aminobutyric acid, or GABA, receptor may be affected. This neurotransmitter slows the speed of nerve impulses and causes muscles to relax.

Interestingly, people with vitamin deficiencies may be more likely to experience disrupted, lacking or ineffective neurotransmitters. Amino acids are the building blocks of neurotransmitter production, but amino acids can’t be generated without first taking in a broad range of vitamins and minerals. Diets that are too low in protein may also contribute to impaired neurotransmitter function. A combination of good nutrition, prescription medications or antidepressants, exercise and psychotherapy are recommended to increase neurotransmitter production and encourage a smooth flow of these critical chemicals in the brain.
https://www.elementsbehavioralhealth.com/mental-health/poor-neurotransmitter-activity-linked-to-mental-illnesses

~~~~~Hormone Imbalance, Not Bipolar Disorder
I now have a sufficient database to report that a significant subset of BP patients are not BP at all but have gonadal hormone problems. Correct identification and treatment of these imbalances stabilize the patients and refute the purported BP (although I do not know how to get the incorrect diagnoses out of insurance records and undo the damage to these peoples lives). This occurs in men and women.

Ladies first:  There are two subgroups here; really, really bad PMS and really, really bad PMS in conjunction with Stein-Leventhal Syndrome (PCOS-PolyCystic Ovarian Syndrome).

Most of these women are diagnosed at relatively early ages, but after menarche. Indeed they have florid mood swings, affective dysregulation, depression, impulsivity, suicidal gestures...the whole gamut. True psychotic symptoms are rare. And yes, they come to me on one of the cocktails du jour. Many do meet criteria for ADHD and PLMD (Periodic Limb Movement Disorder) but these have always been subordinate to the horrible, Rapid Cycling BP.

Careful history, often with input from parents, partners or spouses reveals--here’s the surprise--that the patient’s cycling correlates closely with her menstrual cycle. In fact, that’s when her BP is harder to control. My impression then becomes, Hmm...

I won’t go into a discussion of hormone cycling, enzymes and neurotransmitters now, but will put some references at the end. In short, after careful evaluation and consideration I detoxify these women from their toxic cocktails. It is difficult and often frightening. But once SSRIs and and dopamine blocking agents are gone, the super-sensitization of the dopamine pathways have cooled-off a tailored titration onto a pulse pattern of Wellbutrin controls the PMS and BP disappears. Imagine that!

No, every woman diagnosed with BP who has PMS does not fit this paradigm, just many of them. Something to consider.

The women with PCOS and BP often haven’t been diagnosed with PCOS yet. Some have. PCOS is characterized by irregular, painful menses, elevated testosterones, masculinization, hirsutism, weight gain and many other features in varying degree. Insulin resistance and Diabetes Mellitus is common. In the patients they may have significant internal hormone fluctuations without the manifestations of a period--menses. Thus it is necessary to get long and careful histories, keep calendars, get hormone assays at “different” times and then decide about treatment. By the bye, most medications for BP cause weight gain and some directly increase blood glucose and all of this is quite bad for a patient with PCOS.

In selected cases the BP meds are withdrawn. The metabolic issues must be addressed; control and suppress androgens to normal female levels, control blood glucose and insulin. Then address the PMS. AS noted above this usually can be accomplished with Wellbutrin, but is some cases wherein the fluctuations are so erratic and unpredictable that a pulse pattern cannot be established effectively Monoamine Oxidase Inhibitors (MAOIs) are used because it is the surge in MAO that occurs abruptly when a woman’s estrogen drops (and the MAO is the enzyme that degrades all biogenic amines--dopamine, serotonin, noradrenalin, et. al.) and induces the miserable moodiness and symptoms of PMS mistakenly called BP in these cases.

Now the men:  this has been more subtle and took longer to clarify. Men have estrogen just as women have testosterone. Testosterone is metabolized into estrogen! I posited years ago that a subset of men are exceedingly rapid metabolizers of testosterone into estrogen (and also some may over-produce it intrinsically). A recent article in the “New England Journal of Medicine” confirmed my supposition.

Anyhow, I figured this one out backwards. After seeing a series of men with putative BP, on all of the usual drugs, I discerned a pattern of diminished libido, sexual dysfunction, subtle feminization and often new and strange sexual thoughts and fantasies. This was always called a medication side effect. However evaluation of hormone levels revealed relative to absolute hypogonadism. I do not attribute the finding to the psychiatric drugs because I have also seen several men who presented with first depressive episodes and no prior treatment with the same features. And their estrogens were usually high normal or abnormal.

But let’s stick with the BP. Finally off psych meds and on testosterone replacement some interesting things happened. Their moodiness, irritability, insomnia, and other symptoms resolved as they were re-masculinized and estrogen levels fell. Some of the time.

A sub-group that has been most fascinating are the super fast metabolizers. When give transdermal testosterone daily the were feminized by immediate conversion to estrogen. This was not considered a good result by the men and their wives. Use of injectable long-acting, slow-release testosterone worked, but not in the traditional 200 mg in the tush every two weeks. After a sufficient duration of treatment (in testosterone replacement therapy blood levels can rise swiftly in a few weeks but clinical response can take three months or more) they began to cycle again, often worse. This has been called ‘roid rage’ from excessive testosterone but in fact the trouble occurred as the testosterone wore off and the estrogen rose dramatically. A sort of male PMS. At first we addressed this by increasing frequency of injection, usually with a lower dose (100 mg or each time). The result would be an individualized but predicable cycle; 3-6 good days followed by the crash. Yet testosterone levels were pretty even. The estrogen levels were cycling down after an injection and skyrocketed with the crash! Eureka.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/attention-please/201310/hormone-imbalance-not-bipolar-disorder

~~~~~Poverty harms brain?
The General conclusion, which can be done here, looks like this: from the neurobiological point of view, poverty is not a lifelong stigma, inherited from ancestors, with whom nothing can be done and which we can only hope for some kind of a successful mutation. But while poverty can ruin the life not only in terms of material well-being, but also literally changing the brain and therefore the psyche. In other words, to obtain a healthy society, need to care not about that, that was not rich, and about how to not be poor.
http://earth-chronicles.com/science/poverty-harms-brain.html

~~~~~Have You Stopped Enjoying Life? Could Be Low Dopamine
Some people feel so bad they want to die, but don’t follow through because they actually lack motivation. There is no pleasure. That must sound doesn’t it, but it holds true for many. Why bother with anything, nothing brings you pleasure… this kind of depression is related to dopamine imbalances. Does it sound like you?

You’ve been trained to equate depression with serotonin deficiency, not dopamine, but in fact people with serotonin-related depression don’t usually wish to die. They feel blue, they have no motivation, sometimes poor self esteem, but they don’t want to really die. They are commonly put on drugs such as Prozac, a very good one if you’re aiming to raise serotonin temporarily. But

Prozac might backfire, I’ll tell you why in a minute. It has to do with fluoride and iodine. My point right now is depression is NOT a Prozac deficiency (or Celexa, or Cymbalta, or Lexapro, or any of them). They may be helpful, and you may rely on them but the point here is depression results from something other than a medication deficiency. There’s an important distinction I want to make, one that could potentially save your life, or someone you love.
http://suzycohen.com/articles/depression_low_dopamine