Saturday, June 17, 2017

How to Express Feelings and the Wonderwall

I am a lover type in my life I can't be any other way.
From my past loves I know life is short and why be confined in your
own life being false fears or scared about whatever it is.
My loves range from a ex teenage prostitute a victim of human trafficking.
To a lady that took me to a gay bar on the first date being from a death
threat from a biker gang, her testifying against them in federal court.
"Not one biker will step foot in a gay bar!" I guess I protected her, 
like her bodyguard!

When I express my feelings and say I love you I have the background to say that I do!
Background? In 1985 I got hit by a car on my moped.
I was stopped in the street making a left turn when a car doing around 45 mph
going down the road didn't see me because he had something on his dashboard
blocking his view. He hit me the bike went forward and I glided with the car grabbing
hold of the hood hanging on until he stopped hard and I couldn't hang on no more and
I hit the road and skidded with the car holding on to the air dam to not go under the car.
All that happened to me in the end was I bruised my kidney so I turned yellow and
it pulled all the ligaments in one leg because my leg got pulled up too fast as I
went over the hood of the car. It took me months to walk again.

Far more than the lady love that almost hit me. I know it would be the same
more likely but I love her! But that is a story untold as I try to save her from herself..
Or each other as I love her also.

All of these things are ok, just need express your feelings to each other.
Married with a lover is such torment without talking about it to the other.
Hiding is crap like in history over and over... Pain without growing up
talking needs, hopes and dreams. To ask what do you need? Is a good start!
You should be able to talk about such things, if not it's a red flag! Get a Divorce!
"Often and often, a marriage hardly differs from prostitution except by being 
harder to escape from." Bertrand Russell

Just sitting there with a red flag letting life pass you by living your own hell?
Tends to make life a hell for other halves also! Maybe it's better to be hit
by a car than to live in hell. But for me I tend to have a protected destiny,
so it won't happen! What else is there to do? The point of Talking!
To get your love to express her feelings. No one, can be ones secret keeper.
If your holding the bag well it's the point to note like to say don't blame me
I'm holding the bag you won't talk to me!

So that does point to why express your feelings, to stop the hurt!

~~~~~We are wired to have feelings. If we express these feelings in off-putting ways, this wiring can invite a disconnect in our relationships.  By contrast, expressing feelings in a safe way can lead to our feeling more connected, especially to loved ones.  Knowing how to express feelings tactfully therefore is vital if you want to feel close to people and to sustain your  relationships.

Sharing positive feelings solidifies relationships.  Love, appreciation, gratitude, delight sharing these feelings builds affectionate bonds.

At the same time, stresses occur in everyone's life, leaving them with sad, scared or mad feelings.  In addition, differences and hurt feelings will occur from time to time between just about any two people who often interact.  Sharing feelings enables you to talk through the situation that had caused the difficulty.  That way you can figure out how the problem occurred and what to do to fix it. Problem-solving together makes negative feelings lift.  Otherwise the problem may linger or get worse, negative feelings may fester, and both you and your relationship suffer.